I got a message one night on Facebook from this random guy, Jamie, I normally wouldn’t answer but this night I did. He seemed so friendly, and we got to chatting. He was a single dad with a little boy as well, newly Christian, recently separated, just looking for some likeminded friends. He was so easy to talk to that all of a sudden, we were messaging first thing in the morning and all day until we went to sleep at night.
After a couple weeks of just texting, we took our sons on a playdate to meet and had a little chuckle at the fact both of them were named Eli. The boys got along great, and we had a lovely time. After, we headed to a café for a coffee and he was angrily messaging someone… turned out to be his ex, I thought ok he comes with some baggage but that’s ok so do I, so I understood. It wasn’t love at first sight but there was something there, I was still being careful. I wanted the one God promised to me and no one else.
He invited me out drinking for his birthday, for a single mum a night out without your kid is very rare, so I was excited. When I got to his house he was already drinking, we were having fun and he even pulled me close for our first kiss. But he was still drinking… a lot, and when the time came to go downtown, he was already drunk. Jamie lasted barely an hour before he made a fool of himself and his mate took him home. I was so annoyed, here I was trying to have some fun for the first time in forever, the guy I liked had just been a Jerk to me and I was left downtown on my own. But I was proud of myself, that I didn’t feel the need to get to that point, like I had in the past to have a good time.
The next morning, I got some very sorry messages from Jamie, he obviously had things he was still dealing with and he promised me he would never get like that again, but I told him “maybe we should just be friends” he understood but was upset about it. Kept saying “he was so disappointed in himself for messing up his chances with me.”
The following month we continued to talk and hangout but just as friends, then one morning he came along to church with me. At the end of the service, he went up for prayer like I had done 2 years before. While he was being prayed for my body began to shake all over the same as it did the first time I was prayed for, tears started to roll down my cheeks and I felt connected to him in a way that’s hard to explain. I felt like it was a sign and maybe he was the right one after all.
The days that followed I thought there’s a couple things I can tell him that will either scare him away or put my mind at ease. I told him I wanted another baby and if he didn’t, we couldn’t be together, he was fine with that and talked about how he’d love to have a little girl. So that was a good answer. Next, I said God told me of a specific man who would be my husband and that I didn’t want to be with anyone until I knew for sure it was him. He replied with, he understood and hoped that man was him. This was important to me… he made me feel supported, he didn’t make me feel like I was crazy or mock me for believing something so unbelievable.
I felt myself falling for this guy, the way he spoke to me was always so sweet and beautiful, he was fun and a good father. He was so kind to my son and it all just felt… meant to be.
On Valentine’s day he asked me to be his, and I said yes. He took me on a date to a lookout with cheese and wine, strawberries and chocolate. It was romantic and felt so right. We started our relationship and once I allowed myself to get attached to him, I fell in love very quickly.
This love was different from anything I had ever felt before, so real, so strong. A month later Jamie proposed, and I said yes despite people thinking we were crazy, and I’d like to say it was happily ever after but that’s not how life works… it takes hard work and persistence, love, trust, forgiveness and understanding. What I can say is its 5 years later and I couldn’t imagine doing life with anyone else but him.
Managing Mayhem 